It worked. I wasn't even trying

I saw a bear today. On my way to the lake, just past the gulf course. I wasn't even scared, not really. I think it was more one of those times where there is no time to get down through the list of other reactions to the "eek!" one. I figure it's about 12th on my list (don't bother to ask me how long the list is...)

I was tripping along totally enjoying the day, bright sun, cool breeze, the smell of fresh cut grass and the really annoying horse fly tenaciously orbiting my head (oo! question! can one enjoy something that is at the same time annoying?) Like I was saying, I was enjoying the day, the walk, the moment, and marveling over the complexities of God's creation. So, when I finally stopped gazing upward at the beauty of the green leaves contrasted against the blue, blue sky and looked down the road I was pleased (to put it mildly) to observe a bear lumbering out from within the clustering ferns of the forest. I suppose it was out on a walk for the same reason as I... too good of a day to stay inside mimicking a couch potato.

I'm proud to announce that I didn't even gasp. Instead, I slowed my pace, stopped and gawked (this action, gawking, is only polite when the object gawked at is not human. Your mother probably taught you that one). Surprisingly, it did the same. Stopped. It didn't gawk, this bear must have had a good mother. After stopping, it then plunked its large, hairy rear on the asphalt and tilted its blunt nose upwind and commenced sampling the breeze. I was downwind, by the way. I think I was about 10 yards from it, give or take a few. Close enough to see the variational coloring of its thick, glossy coat. It's a Black bear, naturally, but as some of you might know, Black bears are not always black. My aforementioned friend was a lighter shade, mostly a dirty tannish color. A bit darker about the face. Glistening chocolate eyes, though a mite beady... and vaguely close set. He was of a medium to large stature, I'd guess about shoulder high to my waist.

Swallowing my breath, I slowly inched my way towards its bulk--it turned to study me, its gaze bland--carefully, carefully, until I was close enough to reach out my hand and...

Just kidding.

I continued to parody a statue until, from the distance, both the bear and I heard a car as it wound its way along the road towards us. The bear's ears twitched and he hastily pulled himself onto all fours and lumbered off into the underbrush, making quite a racket, I must say.

I breathed again.

And finished my peripateticical wanderings.