6/27/05

Silence

Silence. It comes in many forms.

1. The typical type that happens after the household enters slumber (finally).
2. *Sigh of relief* When Aunt Gemima FINALLY ends her soliloquy on the best way to tie off the yarn ends on her plastic canvas project.
3. The eye of a hurricane.
4. Once the baby falls asleep (after three hours spent with the kid in the middle of the night... arrrrg).
5. Right after a cannon fires three feet from your ear (it's called deafness).
6. What happens when a parent bursts into the room and asks: "Who broke the lamp!?!?"
7. A silence so complete that it's loud.
8. The noise a leech makes when it swims up to your bare leg.
9. Rain on the roof in the middle of the night... (it's a liberated silence, ok?)
10. When someone finally shoots the dog that never stops barking....
11. Falling snow.
12. Grass growing.
13. Radio waves... until they run into a receptor.
14. What happens in your brain when you are suddenly put on the spot and NEED to respond RIGHT NOW (eg. "Uh duuuh" complete with idiotic facial expressions).
15. The hush in a stadium as the ball flies through the air: is it really going to be a grand slam or not?!
16. The arrival of peace.
17. Virus attack!!! (Computer or otherwise).
18. A split second before the conductor directs the commencement of a glorious orchestration.
19. What descends when they finally turn off the fire alarm in the home for hearing challenged persons.
20. NOT what happens once the leach is found.

Shhh, quiet! I'm trying to hear the mold spores grow on my 8 week old tuna salad...

The end.

8 comments:

Booker said...

You do realize #10 is very temporary? Cause then it's owners start hollering and they will make just as much noise, if not more, than the dog. And you can go to jail for shooting the owners...

redsoxwinthisyear said...

Is #10 a reference to Woody?
And Derrick, are you speaking from some kind of personal experience, or just a fantasy induced by some annoying creature nearby?

TripleNine said...

I can totally identify with #2. Except he is my house mate, not Aunt Jemimah. Number 11 is probably one of my favorites. There is nothing like a night walk through falling snow.

Laughter said...

Nope, not Woody. Just a clever reference from within my incredible intellect.

Booker said...

personal experience. Thankfully, being the sneaky and devious guy that I am, I haven't been caught. But if you ever hear about a dog and it's owner "disappearing", well, you get the picture...

Laughter said...

I look for honest comments... serious or otherwise.

You're just fine. :)

Anonymous said...

Our neighbor's dog, the one that never stops barking...

well, it just got stolen!

This really happened - just ask Kate. :O)

Lisa

Anonymous said...

PS Laughter, thanks for listening to me and getting a blog. It's just as satisfying as I thought it would be!

your big sis